Do you, Mr. Wheel, take this woman to be your lawfully wedded wife? A married fair ride is just the tip of the weird iceberg in this week's ONLY IN FLORIDA.ONLY IN FLORIDA is our weekly roundup of the strange, bizarre and just plain ridiculous headlines from right here in the Sunshine State.
ONLY IN FLORIDA do people impersonate police officers just so they can get a donut discount.
48-year-old Chuck Barry (yes, that is his real name) was arrested Tuesday in New Port Rickey after pulling into the local Dunkin Donuts drive-thru and flashing his late father’s police badge.
He also showed the drive-thru worker his gun to prove he was in fact an officer of the law.
Apparently Barry pulled off this trick several times before employees got wise to his scam and they called the actual police.
Deputies set up a traffic stop and arrested Barry. There was no word on whether the grateful Dunkin Donuts workers ran out with a dozen glazed to thank the real authorities. (WJCT, Gawker)
ONLY IN FLORIDA do people call 911 because their neighbors won’t get drunk with them.
James Collins of Fort Pierce called the emergency number twice on his 56th birthday, telling police he was upset that his neighbors were “mean” and wouldn’t join him to crack open a few cold ones.
Collins was arrested on charges including disorderly intoxication and misuse of 911. (TCPalm)
ONLY IN FLORIDA do people fight for their right to marry inanimate objects.
Linda Ducharme of Gibsonton recently renewed her vows with her one true love. It’s a Ferris wheel. She calls it "Bruce" and feeds it pizza.
Says Linda, “When you’re in love with the object, you become at one with the object.” Ducharme used to be on the U.S. National Archery Team.
Psychologists say she suffers from a phenomenon known as “objectum sexuality,” or the belief that objects have a spiritual essence. (WTSP Tampa)
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You can follow Melissa Ross on Twitter @MelissainJax and Patrick Donges at @patrickhdonges.
